What’s next?!

What’s next?!

So where or how do you go from being married, to being a widow, to what is next in my life. What is your new role in life now that you are widowed?  That is a huge question when one has had their lives planned out for what seemed like forever.  For many of you there are still a ton of emotions which you are going through.  For others, you are beginning to think now what?  For others, you may be stepping forward to a new stage of your life to helping others.  For others, you may be dating. And for others, they have remarried.  

Now that the holidays are behind us, now what?  This can be a loaded question for sure!  Ever feel that way?  The holidays can be an emotional roller coaster.   Rest assured, the roller coaster ride does even out and life does become a new normal without as many highs and lows.  The journey may be different and you may realize that it’s time to figure out what it is next for you.   

Even though we are all at different stages of this journey, life is living all around us.  As you reevaluate your life since your loss, what can you reflect on that is positive?  What are your interests?  What are your gifts?  What tugs at your heart that you like to do?   Perhaps you love to work with children, volunteer for a local charity, help with those who have disabilities, perhaps you have a compassion for those walking the journey you have been walking down.

Are you ready to turn your hurting into hope?   John 14:27 reads:  Peace I leave with you, my peace I give to you.  God promises to give us peace through our hurting.   I totally understand that this journey is a process.  Are you ready to go down the journey with hope?

I remember struggling with what was next for me…..  Within a couple of years after Dan died, our kids headed off to start their lives, one going off to start his career, one off to the Army and the last off to college.  For me, it wasn’t until I had an empty nest that I truly began to think about what was next for me.  I will admit it took me a long time to figure it out.  I was still working and had that to keep me going. 

Pretty soon my kids were getting married and had children to help with putting some fun with traveling along the way.  Oh I still do some traveling but now that I’m retired, I have found helping others with this journey is rewarding for me.

If you are ready, consider what may work for you and perhaps help others.  Perhaps sending a note or email to someone who is hurting or a note of thanks for a kind gesture or note you received from someone.  Sometimes it helps during our process to give thanks but it’s not always easy.  If you are not at that stage yet, it is perfectly understandable.

I can totally relate to your loss.  There are days when you are thinking, I just wish he was here with me to go out to dinner with or a movie.  The hope we have in Christ is we will see our husbands again.   Again – the hope we have in Christ. 

Many of you have found what you love doing in helping others.  Others are not ready for that yet.  Some of you will continue doing what you are doing as you are exactly where you are supposed to be. 

Wherever you are in your journey, I pray you find peace in your journey