Wednesday, May 30, 2018

What are your memories????


What are your memories????


Are you one that reflects on things of the past and wonders on things of the future?  With each holiday, birthday or anniversary whether it is a good memory or not, I am one of those that does.   Although I do not reflect for each holiday, but some more than others.  I have a feeling most of us have some that stick out more than others.  Some were happier and others were not.  

Personally I am not one who regularly goes to the cemetery let along on Memorial Day weekend.  Each of us handles this holiday in our own way.  The cemetery where my late husband is buried is at a national cemetery not far from me.  There was a lot of publicity this year as a flag was going to be placed at each tombstone for the first time in 35 years.  So I decided to go to Ft Snelling to see how it looked – along with visiting Dan’s grave site.  It was a beautiful (but hot) sunny day. Everything was so green and the number of flags was amazing. 

Traffic near Ft. Snelling was being directed as this is the fourth busiest national cemetery in the United States.  There were a group of former Vets called the Patriot Guard who helped direct traffic inside the cemetery along with helping those who needed help locating their loved ones.  I was also given a pink rose as I entered the area I was going to.  I found myself not at all sad visiting there that day.  As I drove out, I found myself being thankful for all of those who have served our country.  Thankful for all of those that had placed over 250,000 flags throughout the cemetery.  Thankful for the Patriot Guard group for helping those who needed help.  Thankful for those who were directing traffic. 

On my commute home, instead of thinking of who I no longer have in my life, I remember those who God has placed in my life to help me along this journey.  I will agree that yes I still do miss Dan but unfortunately I cannot bring him back.  There are those days when I think of the what ifs.  However, I find that I need to rely on God for what I do not have control over. For me Psalms 23 is such comfort.  In verse 4 it reads; Even though I walk through the darkest valley, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me.

With time, it seems like the pain eases and the memories of the hurt ease up.  As we travel down this journey, the day will come when we need to focus on the good in life.  What would our husband really want for us?  Would he want us to sit back and grieve 24/7?   If we are honest, I do not believe he would.  So what can we do to overcome this change in our life?  This may be different for each of us.  Some may go down similar roads to be of help, comfort and support for other widows. Or perhaps you may find something you have a passion to do. 

As I have gone down this journey, I have been able to be thankful for those who have come in my life.  Philippians 1:2 and 3 I thank my God in all my remembrance of you, always offering prayer with joy in my every prayer for you all. 

My prayer for each of you going down this journey, is that you find God’s peace and joy in your life once again.  Blessings to each of you as you will once again live, heal, grow and in time thrive.